Home Mom Stuff Co-Parenting the Dynamic Duo-ish

the Dynamic Duo-ish

This weekend marked the beginning of Monkey-palooza and we spent three glorious days at the Magic Mouse House. I love that place. It’s great for people watching and the Monkey loves every second of the rides and the food and the people watching. That’s right my almost 4-year old kiddo is a practiced people watcher and I am wickedly proud. By Day 2, at around lunchtime I noticed a startling trend between couples as our little group enjoyed the watching of various peoples young and old. Our favorite as kids, my sister and I used to watch for people wearing shoes that didn’t fit. Seriously. We would sit with our Mom at Laurel Plaza (I don’t think it exists anymore)in North Hollywood eating ice cream and watching people walk to and from their destinations. So it was ever so pleasing to see the little Monkey noticing people’s little fashion quirks and strange habits as we waited in line to phew the crap outta Zurg.

With my being in the thick of dating and non-dating, I noticed mostly the couples. That’s right I was couple watching. Some of it was gross with all the making out and the heavy petting, and other were adorable with their hand holding and cute chatter. This was not was disturbed me to the core. What was really frustrating were the couples who appeared ambiguous. Neither seemed to stand out and there were sort of well matchy-matchy. Before I go on let me just say I know people gravitate toward people who have similar likes and dislikes and blah, blah, blah. But common bonds aside there is something about a couple that has lost all sense of individuality that disturbs me. Like gawking disturbed. It’s what I’ve seen many people do including the Bio and I call it Dressing to Date.

Okay it is totally different from getting dressed for a date. Not at all the same thing. However it is dressing to suite the style of the person you are with in order to fit more neatly into their world. The Bio did it with me and now with the New Lady, he rolls his jeans on occasion and wears plaid shirts that he used to think were ‘for retarded people who don’t think’. I’ve got tons of guy friends who get sucked into that whole concept and usually it starts with the girlfriend-to-be buying one or two token items to sharpen up the wardrobe and eventually leads to the whole Man-over. Ick. This weekend I saw my first cases of Woman-Gone-Blah Syndrome. The funny thing about when it happens to my Kind is that we usually keeps small distinguishing characteristics that we apparently think are subtle enough to not distract entirely from the cuteness we are creating with the Man at our side. Whereas, women do the best they can to erase every trace of the former attire in question…goodbye shoes that were soooo comfy and don’t you dare keep that flannel!!

The couple most noted in my theme park research where the pseudo-Hippie-wanna-bees. He had the long-ish uncombed hair, worn jeans and Thrift store t-shirt and of course the overly worn Chucks he’s probably had since 10th Grade…and his mate was a slightly more polished version of his Funky Junky ensemble. Her linen shirt was obviously Banana and her khakis had definitely been pressed at some point and her hair was the most meticulously braided piece of OCD I’d ever seen on a woman’s head. Even if they had been introduced at some Peace for Peace’s Sake Rally she was quite definitely the more polished version of his Hippy Chic look that by the way he smelled was a true way of life and not that it diminishes who they are as a couple, I noticed last her hand bag…D&G…that’s right a Hippie with a label. It’s not in my line of life to judge these folks but I find it interesting when we change anything about who we are to fit more appropriately into anyone’s life. Whether it’s clothes, personality or just the whole lifestyle change to make the other person or the whole relationship make more sense it’s baffling to me at this point in my life.

On one hand it might be entirely natural to assimilate to the environment we desire to become a practicing member…right? Or maybe it’s just insecurity that leads us to alter ourselves to fit into a new life changer. From my own experience changing to fit into someone else’s plan never works out for either person. Case in point…when the Bio and I started dating he adopted my Punker Style and changed to suite me just enough to keep me going in his direction. Not that he started wearing fishnets or anything, but umm HOT. He just changed his casual appearance and adopted a harder and edgier look. Total fail.

Taken by the Mama: the Day it all ended
Taken by the Mama: the Day it all ended

I’ve always been a free spirit. The Black-ish Sheep of my family. The pseudo Hippie Girl who hates wearing a bra and prefers to never wear pants cause of the restrictive qualities and prohibitive nature for on the spot Hotness. I like how I dress. I like that sometimes I don’t match the way everyone wants me too. I love being comfy and looking sexy all at the same time. I love flowy dresses and hoop earrings…I love, love, love being barefoot. I’ve had an evolution of style that is my own and nobody else’s. I don’t expect the person I date to coordinate with me or like everything I wear.Love me for me, bitches.

What if anything have we learned tonight? Before you jump at the chance to try on someone else’s Life and/or Style think about what you are losing. Even just changing your appearance is in my opinion dumping yourself for someone else and well we all know how awful it can be to be broken up with, let alone by ourselves.


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