Opposites Distract?


Alright so I’ve been over thinking something…surprised? Well you shouldn’t be!!

Last night I had a great talk with Kali…again…who is counseling me through my current ailment and making sure I do my nightly stretching and low impact workout so I don’t blow up like a balloon from the meds like I did last time. I explained to her my current over thinking topic and she laughed, like peed her pants laughter. It was awesome.

Current Topic? Opposites Distract.

Notice I didn’t say ‘Attract’? There’s totally a reason. And here it is…do we in fact get attracted more by a person who we have nothing in common with or do we in fact just get distracted by them? More because we are exhausted by the mayhem ravaged upon our souls by those who we have oodles in common post-heartbreak. Are those who we share no general interest in just distractions from the norm brought on by the need for change from what we really find attractive?

Case in point…my Folks were total opposites when they met. My Dad was a Saturday Night Fever Hippie and my Mom was a Mexican-Catholic Princess. They met, they fell in love and they got married 3 months later without knowing much about each other. My Mami had never cooked, made her own bed or done much around the house for that matter…and my Dad was a former MP with a penchant for the Greener Life that the 70’s had to offer. They were truly Opposites Distracted by each other. And today they have grown into something I respect and admire. Truth my friends…my parents Rock.

Honestly, I’m feeling a bit distracted by Mr. Awesome and I’m not sure I like it. I am distracted from the usual shiny objects that turn my head andbased onthat I’ve started to over think my usual attractions to the Artsy Fartsy type that usually drags my heart through the mud and leaves me sitting in a pile of my own tears and regret. It’s odd but I’ve even found myself not being attracted to the Norm when it’s served up to me on a plate. WTF?!? That’s right this guy who’s Mr. C’s good friend called me up out of nowhere and asked me for coffee when he’s in Lost Angels next week, and I said ‘Maybe another time’. Umm, what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-me? I’M DISTRACTED!!!! (we’ll come back to this one)

In turning to Kali I got a huge shock…she’s got a boyfriend. Umm, hello! I had no clue. They have been doing the whole Cat ‘n Mouse thing for about three months and three weeks ago she agreed to go on ONE date with him and that was that. But turns out not so much. And here’s where it gets interesting…he’s not her ‘usual’ type says she and here’s why…

  • He isn’t into working out…he does but only to keep healthy…Kali is a self-proclaimed gym addict and would go twice a day if she could…oh wait she does.
  • His job is working with a non-profit arts foundation…Kali didn’t even know what a non-profit was until she met him.
  • For fun he goes to galleries, the opera and goes wine tasting…Kali hates the taste of wine and calls Opera a snooze fest for old people.
  • The New Mister volunteers with several foundations to keep himself busy…Kali wouldn’t volunteer to save her cat if you paid her.

Oddly enough, she’s in deep Smitten-ness with the New Mister, and it’s crazy funny!! You see Kali has always dated guys who matched her Laura Croft-ness. Ubber hardcore Gym Rats with Meat between the ears and on their plates…this guy prefersmore than justCow.So, she’s dating someone who in her own words, she would ‘picture with my tree hugging ass’ and not with her. Is she distracted by this opposite of her Norm or is there maybe something to this crazy idea? Is there such a thing as a type or do we just gravitate towards the people who we find ourselves attracted to at any given moment? I’m honestly second guessing my original theory…

back to the earlier coffee thing…I have eyed this guy for years, I mean since Mr. C and I became friends back in 2000. He’s always had a girlfriend and/or been in another country. When I asked Mr. C about him like 10 years ago he simply replied, ‘give it time, my lady’. But now he’s single and really more my type than Mr. Awesome, I mean if I were to make a list it’d be scary…and alas I’m not gonna do it. There is a knot in my stomach when I think about dating someone with his kind of past and present. He’s a heart breaker. He’s a nomad who will never set down roots and that’s why his relationships always end in turmoil. And today I’m grown-up enough to look at the situation and see it for what it is. I’m not 21 anymore…’nough said.

If two people have almost nothing in common witheach other is that really a deal breaker? If what we usually find ourselves attracted to in the past is only leavingsomeone with heartbreak and tears does that make sense either? There is soooo much over thinking to be done on this subject.

Personally, I’m not more sure than I was when I started writing this whole catastrophe. But I’m pretty sure there is a reason we are attracted or distracted to someone. What’s the point? What does it mean? I don’t know yet. I don’t get it. But I’m gonna keep over thinking it and let you know again later.


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