I’m taking a leap. Doing things I don’t normally do. Actually thinking about me first and foremost, and not working through the harmful thought process that involves putting others first before me. And it feels good. Truly it’s like I’ve opened a door on something and me thinks my Therapist is going to Poo a Golden Brick when I see her next time. The tough part is really taking me by the Horns and just doing what I feel, aka Going with the Gut. I’m a friggin’ Libra so everything I’ve ever done has been about weighing my options. For example…Does A make more sense than B? And what does B really have that A doesn’t have? This can often take the fun out of most decisions, but since my early adulthood was filled with too many choices that were not thought through I embraced this thinking after meeting the Bio and it stuck.I was the planner. In our relationship I was the Voice of Reason. I was always put on the Back burner. (inserting Boo-ing here).
So I credit this new Go with the Gut with my choice to get my first Tattoo. Once upon a time I was a Pierced Maven of Punk Rock and that was perfect for the time and the angst I was putting myself through. However, I could never pick a Tat that exemplified Me. Or that really meant a damn thing and that’s what I always searched out in the possibility of getting one. But for some reason nothing ever felt right. In my family, there are many folks with a variety of Tattoo artwork and each of them has a story or a reason or something compelling that made that piece of work stand out. So that’s what I was waiting for with my choice. Hell even one of my former BF’s was married to a very talented artist and even offered me free work if I could just pick one! But alas I could not.
Why now? Well for starters I am inspired. I have this deep feeling that compels me to get this work done now. My Tio passed away almost a month ago. He was a connoisseur of Tattoo Art. He sought out legendary artists to do his work. He loved it. It was a passion of his. Before he passed and while my Mom was undergoing surgery for the now gone Tumor, we had a long talk about artwork. He asked me when I was going to get one and if I had thought about who I’d go to…at that point I still had nothing compelling me to do it. So we joked and laughed about it and he told me that ‘One way or another, I’m going to get a Tat on you’. Two weeks later he was gone. Two weeks later my sister and I looked at each other, our eyes filled with tears and I said ‘It’s time now’. And she knew what I meant. It’s time for me to get my first Tattoo.
I’m not getting one of those crosses or anything that say En Memoria, because that’s not Me. I’m not getting his name anywhere on my body. I’ve thought this through and my sister drew it up for us. Together we are going to get a piece of artwork that symbolizes the bond between two nieces and a Tio who taught me the value of Family. It will be beautiful…