Easter is here. Lent is therefore done. Which means that my boycott giving up of on-line dating for Lent is done. There’s been so much going on all over the world of me that I haven’t had a ton of stuff to blog about in the dating realm. Oh, well there was that whole losing my job thing, but yeah okay that was big. And yet all has been calm in the rest of the world around me for the most part. You know the usual family stuff, the usual friend stuff…oh wait, I had to denounce Nomad as a bestie…but for the most part the usual.

I know, I know so the big question of which prevails. Will Mama go back to the on-line dating?

While the answer should be cut and dry, I think there is way more to the reason that I will in fact not go back to the Pit of Ridiculous that is on-line dating. While I wish it was as simple as I’m just done with it and I’ve learned that being away from it did not in fact make my heart grow fonder, there is way more to it and here’s the reasons why.

• I like my face.
• First dates should start out with two sober individuals. Six Guinness before a date is unimpressive. During or after, sure but not before.
• The two men I met worth dating had secret lives and not fun ones.
• Since I don’t share an office with the Rachel anymore, Quick Match on OKC just won’t be the same.
• Refuse to read ‘work hard, party hard’ on another profile.
• Have no desire to meet another man who accepted going out with me thinking I was sure thing since I’ve got a kid. Mama has standards and I reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. Plus that’s why Jeebus invented vibrators.
• Refuse to be the reason a man’s divorce begins. Or trial separation for that matter.
• I’m thoroughly disturbed by the amount of men who use ALL CAPS SO AS TO NOT HAVE TO CAP A WORD.
• Mama is running out of first date outfits that the bartenders at South Point Grill haven’t seen yet.
• Disturbed by the amount of men who have no one to take a recent picture of them. This then obviously means they have no friends which leads me to believe they are sad and lonely and I’ve not got the amount of time to dedicate to keeping them above board.
• I’ve got no desire to be someone’s next Baby Mama.
• Refuse to date a man who constantly wishes out loud that his Ex would ‘die a horrible death’.
• I’m tired of meeting men who are looking for someone to replace their Mother.
• I can’t date a man who can’t be comfortable with my Numbers.
• Have no desire to date another man who thinks being responsible means knowing how to Empty and Reboot.
• Tired of keeping flats in purse cause I know I’m going to get drunk enough to warrant walking home.
• Tired of 5’11” really meaning 5’7″
• Psychoanalysis shouldn’t happen on a first date.
• Nor should anything having to do with psycho for that matter.
• Have no desire to go on a first date with a man who pretend we ran into his friends and all their girlfriends…it’s a test I’m not stupid.
• Just because a man paid for eHarmony doesn’t mean he’s ready for a relationship. They don’t test for the seven thousand points of commitment phobia in anyone.
• You don’t get what you pay for but if you don’t pay you also get what you don’t pay for in that case.
• I am exhausted.

On-line dating has become one of those novelty things I do when I get bored with organic dating, and when I feel like there is no hope for meeting a real person in real life. I know people who have met people on certain dating sites and been perfectly happy. I get it. It happens. I’ve met some genuinely interesting people and collected a shit ton of wicked cool, You’re Never Going to Believe this Stories.

Will I go back? Meh, I don’t know. I’m a Never Say Never kinda lady. And I’ve given it up before. I’ve come back before. And I might again. But at this point in my dating career I’m a step away from beginning a running stride toward never looking back. Oh who am I kidding eventually if I get bored enough I might. Ugh. I honestly have no use for it right now.

What next Mama? Well, I’m going to log-in to the three dating sites I have profiles on and put them on hold or delete them I’m not sure. I’m an optimist so I’m hoping that my current dating situation keeps on the path of awesomeness and that I don’t have to go back any time in the near future. So, yeah I’m putting my focus there and heaving the on-line dating profiles. Right now in this moment I just don’t have the desire and so we move forward and move on…

Good luck on-line daters. Peace.